Could I get a poetry critique on this piece? http://www.helium.com/tm/765284/migraineevery-alonein-bedin-dark
I’ve just started writing poetry, and I’d love a critique on this piece:
http://www.helium.com/tm/765284/migraineevery-alonein-bedin-darkjust
- Merr Chandler
Tags: Helium, Poetry Critique, Poetry Love, Writing Poetry
November 19th, 2009 at 7:47 pm
The poem itself has a lot of promise in the way of subject matter, but it needs a little bit of work on expanding the the images to draw the reader into your realm of pain. What you are feeling, what you are seeing, your thoughts, etc. As a migraine sufferer myself, no one can relate unless they have felt the intense all consuming blackness of the migraine. Don’t give up on the writing, just re work the poem and feel the pain as you do so. Good luck.