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The Ten Commandments of the Gentleman Cat by May Sarton
A Gentleman Cat has an immaculate shirt front and paws at all times.
A Gentleman Cat allows no constraint of his person, even loving constraint.
A Gentleman Cat does not mew except in extremity. He makes his wishes known and waits.
When addressed, A Gentleman Cat does not move a muscle. He looks as if he hadn't heard.
When frightened, A Gentleman Cat looks bored.
A Gentleman Cat takes no interest in other people's affairs, unless he is directly concerned.
A Gentleman Cat approaches food slowly, however hungry he may be, and decides at least three feet away whether it is Good, Fair, Passable, or Unworthy. If Unworthy, he pretends to scratch earth over it.
A Gentleman Cat gives thanks for a Worthy meal, by licking the plate so clean that a person might think it had been washed.
A Gentleman Cat is never hasty when choosing a housekeeper.