We Tend To Make Up Our Own Truths: What Stories Are You Making Up?
Someone once said that man keeps looking for truth that fits his reality. Oddly, more often than looking for truth, we tend to make up our own truths. Meet Roger & Elaine. Roger is attracted to Elaine and asks her out. She accepts; they have a good time. Later, he asks her out again, and again they enjoy themselves. After a while neither one of them is seeing anyone else.
One evening on the way home, a thought occurs to Elaine. She says, "do you realize that we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?"Silence. I wonder if that bothered him? Maybe he feels confined.
Maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him, Elaine thinks.
Roger, meanwhile, thinks, "six months?"
Elaine's thoughts continue. But I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship either. I wish I had more space, time to think about where we are going. Are we just going to keep seeing each other like this? Marriage? Children? Am I ready? Do I even know him?
Roger's thoughts are a little different: so that means ...let's see?February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means I'm?Whoa! Way overdue for an oil change!
"He's upset," muses Elaine, "It's on his face." He wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. She gasps, mentally. He's afraid of being rejected!"And they are going to look at the transmission again, it's still not shifting right. They better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. I can't believe it cost $600. I'll bet..."
He's angry -- I don't blame him. I'd be angry too. I feel so guilty for putting him through this, butI can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure if...
"They'll say it's only a 90 day warranty. I'll bet they'll tell me..."
I'm too idealistic, waiting for a knight on a white horse. I'm sitting beside a perfectly good person. I enjoy being with Roger, I care about him...he cares about me. And now he's in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic...
"Warranty? I'll tell them what to do with their warranty. They can-"
"Roger," says Elaine, interupting Roger's mental tirade.
"Huh?" Says Roger, startled.
"Please don't torture yourself," she says, her eyes beginning to mist. "Maybe I should never have?..oh, I feel so awful?"Roger stays silent, but one eyebrow lifts slightly in puzzlement.
"I'm such a fool," Elaine sobs, "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that's silly. There's no knight and no horse."
"No horse?" Roger's eyebrow rises another quarter inch.
"You think I'm a fool, don't you?"
"No!" Says Roger, relieved.
"I need time," Elaine says.
"Yes," he says, after a brief pause.Elaine, moved, reaches to touch his hand.
"Oh Roger, do you really feel that way about me?"
"Yes indeed," says Roger hesitantly.
"Thank you, Roger," She says.
" Thank you," says Roger.
The next day, Elaine calls her best friend. Together they analyze the whole scenario in a marathon two hour conversation. A few days later, Roger plays racquetball with a mutual friend of their's. He pauses before serving and asks, "did Elaine ever own a horse?"
The ways that we see ourselves and the world at large is a function of the "stories" that we make up.
We need to challenge our views on things. After doing this, a whole new set of opportunities may emerge. Our stories lurk in the strangest places!
Eric Johnson is a regular contributor to the Investor's Value View Newsletter. To learn how to contact Mr. Johnson or to subscribe to the Investor's Value View Newsletter, visit http://www.valueview.net
MORE RESOURCES:
FileMaker Developers Win $1000 for Your Creativity prMac (press release), TX - This is where your creativity will come into play. There are numerous FileMaker databases that are just waiting to be designed for use on the iPhone. ... |
 BigNews.biz (press release) | Creativity and Flexibility in Custom Branded Items: BigNews.biz (press release), MA - This high level of flexibility and creativity is found across the board in the product offerings of Factory Direct Promos ... |
Learning from small town creativity and commerce Princeton Union Eagle, MN - In both cases, they’ve responded with creativity and cooperation to draw in millions of dollars, and survive, as other places declined. ... |
Workplace Creativity Activated by Reflexology, Chair Massage PR Web (press release), WA - These blends are used in conjunction with specialized massage techniques to enhance mood, boost creativity and stimulate immune system function. ... |
Canada Amnesty International Secretary General: Cultural Show ... The Epoch Times, NY - It obviously reflects considerable hard work and talent and creativity," said Neve who is the Secretary General of Amnesty International Canada. ... Filmmaker Gets Ideas, Inspiration ‘A true delight’ Says Public Official |
 BBC Sport | Darlington boss wants creativity BBC Sport, UK - Darlington manager Dave Penney has warned his side they must be more creative going forward following Saturday's 2-1 win against Bournemouth. ... |
Market calls for creativity, quick thinking Inman.com, CA - By Inman News, Monday, January 5, 2009. Jacky Teplitzky is a managing director at Manhattan-based brokerage company Prudential Douglas Elliman, ... |
Creativity, cooperation would yield workable plan for Duluth schools Duluth News Tribune, MN - The Duluth public schools could cooperate with the city of Duluth and the University of Minnesota Duluth to make the city more livable, more environmentally ... |
We have entered the European Year of Creativity and Innovation 2009! EurofundingMag, France - Innovate” has been chosen to illustrate the official launch of the European Year of Creativity and Innovation 2009 that will be done by the Czech Presidency ... EC Launches European Year of Creativity and Innovation |
Creativity versus standards in the user interface InfoWorld, CA - On the other hand, creativity for its own sake just confuses users. I can think of dozens, perhaps hundreds of examples of user interfaces done badly for ... |
How To Master Your Game
Learn how to master your area of endeavor the right way. Start out by finding the people and books that will make you exceptional.
Unlock Your Creative Secret Weapon
It seems like this week a ton of people have been asking me how they can become more creative. I even had one client jokingly accuse me of being in cahoots with the Devil in trade for my creativity.
Our Limitless Quantum Reality
Modern science tells us that on a sub-atomic level -- nothing is solid. That the entire universe is really one big web of vibrating "energy stew.
Overcoming Artists Block (part 2)
Once you are ready to start working again you will know itinstinctively. All artists go through periods of 'creative block' - it's normal, but after one such episode there are ways of stimulating ideas and getting the creative juices flowing again.
Break An Egg For Creativity
In 1420, the dignitaries of Florence held a competition.They offered the enormous prize of 200 gold florins to the architect whose genius could span the unfinished dome of the Florence Cathedral.
20 Ways to Keep Your Writing Inspiration and Creativity High
When stressed or blocked it is wise to make a change so thatwe don't stay in that place. Yet, many times we forget someof the simple things that we can do for ourselves, quicklyand easily to bring our inspiration back and increase ourcreativity.
Creativity Management - The Value Of An Idea?
Creativity can be defined as problem identification and idea generation whilst innovation can be defined as idea selection, development and commercialisation.There are other useful definitions in this field, for example, creativity can be defined as consisting of a number of ideas, a number of diverse ideas and a number of novel ideas.
The Optimal Mind State
Let's begin by defining the optimal mind state and the power it will give you to channel your energy toward your desired outcome. The optimal mind state is a quality of attention that leads to the highest level of concentration.
Creativity Isnt Just About Art It Is About Healing
Go on, pick up a pen, hold it in your hand and ask, " What can you do for me?"What do you hear? If you listen with your heart you may hear " I can show you a world within that only you and I can explore! Let's start writing and see what we can find."As you travel deeper within you will start to find a world of emotion and thoughts that you never imagined you had, whether you are delving into those dark corners of pain or dancing into the lightness of your being.
Innovation: Wake Up Your People's Creative Genius
Successful companies have innovation in their blood. The single most important element in an innovative company is the creativity of their people.
Creative Drought
For the past several hours, I've struggled with this week's message, the words, "what will I write?" screaming in my ears. I've felt like the princess who promises her first born child to the little man named "Rumplestiltskin" if only he will spin straw into gold.
How To Increase Creativity... Set Deadlines!
Deadlines are something all of us face from time to time. We face deadlines whenever we set even a small goal and commit to accomplish it.
Mind Mapping
Ever been on a project where you had trouble keeping all the 'if' questions straight? "If this happens," you say, "we'll do one thing. But, if that happens, we'll do something else instead, but only on a Wednesday.
12 Ways To Boost Your Creativity At Work
As workplaces continue to rightsize and downsize, we all find ourselves doing more with less. How do we stay ahead of the workload while staying sane? The key is to put your creativity to work for you so you can do more with less and shine like never before.
Re-Energize Your Brain
We all use tools in our work, and all of these tools need to be re-energized in some way over time. They need to be polished, sharpened, refurbished.
How Do You Paint New Age
About once every year or so, I take a critical look at the design of my web site and now our popular newsletter and wonder what I could do to create a theme background for them.The site has been changed several times over the last four years, but it doesn't really have a theme backdrop.
Business Innovation - Personal Creativity
Creativity can be defined as problem identification and idea generation whilst innovation can be defined as idea selection, development and commercialisation.There are other useful definitions in this field, for example, creativity can be defined as consisting of a number of ideas, a number of diverse ideas and a number of novel ideas.
Take Time To Think
I recently saw a program on television wherein the participants discussed the degree to which present day computer technology has contributed to our economy, well-being and our ability to communicate. They pointed out the many ways that this technology was already obsolete and that further refinements will impact our future in ways we dare not imagine.
Dancing On Your Brain: The Cha-Cha Effect
My grandmother used to say that the secret to living a good life is maintaining a flexible spine and a flexible mind. Whether we're talking about joints or brains, there's just no room for rigidity.
Produce Creativity: 4 Ways To Motivate Your Melon
It was 8:00 PM and I'd hit a creative wall - hard. But there was so much work to be done! And I just had to get out of the office or else my article would never get finished.
